Day 66: Perspective

Okay, so for anyone who has been reading this blog from the start, this is sort of the part where I apologise. For whining! I have spent some time this week trying to remind myself why I was so incredibly happy when I first made the decision to stop drinking. And why, now, that everything in my life is falling into place, I am so crippled by angst and dismay. It's simple - my husband is right (imagine that??) - I choose to be. I went through the list of things that make me unhappy and there is not a single thing on that list that I can do ANYTHING about. Not a single person who's mind I will be able to change. In fact, the whole LIST CONCEPT is a big black hole and I destroyed it.

So I believe it is a perspective thing - it depends completely on how you look at it. So I rummaged through all the debris of the past and salvaged my rosy pink paintbrush and given everything a new coat of rosy coloured pinkness. And I feel better. Because not matter what happened in the past or how many burnt bridges need repairing or sour relationships needs sugaring up - I am still sober. And that really makes me happy. If sobriety is the only thing I have to be happy about - isn't it enough compared to the unhappy train wreck of my past? So still, no miracle happened and today is a normal day. Yet, my heart feels lighter and that's encouraging.

The optimist says the glass is half full, the pessimist says the glass is half empty...
the engineer says, we've used the wrong size glass for the job.