My life in days

It's a strange feeling to make up your mind. It's sort of scary, yet exciting. As much as you expect a certain result from your decision - in same amount you fear the possible outcome. It's liberating never the less. Sticking to it, now that's a whole other ball game... I don't think I have ever really made up my mind so entirely literally as I have now. It feels like a physical action and it's electric.
My husband and I have separated, temporarily, mainly because I asked him to please leave. Sobriety is hard enough without having to deal with someone else's drinking. But this decision I find, has to do with more than alcohol. It's about finding me in an empty space. Removed from what I held as truth and released from what I believed was borders. For the first time in years, literally, I feel like I can breathe. And it's wonderful.
I have not completely renounced the possibility of reconciliation, but then, every alkie reading my blog will know what it would take. And no less will I settle for, because I am worth it. In the meantime, I am living my life in days. Getting reacquainted with an old dear friend. She is wonderful, thoughtful, kind, caring and dear. A little sad, allot angry, but extremely brave. She might just get me through this. One day at a time.