90 Days and counting...

I stopped counting my sober days months back. On previous attempts I felt so much pressure and lived in the future too much, forgetting to take it one day at a time. Now I am at 90 days. I feel blessed, I feel lucky that I am making a difference in my own life and I am proud of myself for sticking it out.
My husband has now been sober for almost 2 months. Some days he looks very unhappy and deep in thought. I sometimes wonder if he will ever find his inner peace. Forgiving yourself for your past wrongs is one of the hardest things to do once you sober up. But I know, one day at a time you create a new you that makes you so proud you cannot comprehend that you where actually the drunkard behind those horrific acts that haunt you so. It becomes like scenes from a movie. Something someone else did that horrifies you to the point of staying sober at all cost. Well at least that is how it is for me.

As the Big Book says: ""We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it."

Today I am greatfull that I am sober.
I am grateful for patience.
I am grateful that I have my family.

I am grateful for warm clothes and a cozy house.

I am grateful for my dog, my cat, chickens and my ducks.

I am grateful for my ability to learn.

I am grateful for the privilage of being a mother.

I am grateful that I have a job that I am good at.

I am grateful for the selfless souls of AA and Alanon.

I am grateful that my sisters are closeby.

I am grateful for a second chance at my marriage. 

I am grateful that I am alive.