From Koos

Hi SS


….10 days and going strong. One day @ time – wonderful program I’m sure you will agree.

I read the contribution on the blog about the chickens and the eagle, great story. It also “attach” quite well to your “detached” feelings. If we want to break free from the past we have to make space between what was and what is and what is going to be. Thank God we don’t know what is going to be. In my early days of sobriety I sometimes said to myself, if I knew this journey is going to be such hard work, I would have carried on drinking – crazy thinking, but I did. Luckily I had the AA tools and Fellowship to realize my irrational thinking and very quickly took my mind back to those insane days and nights where I hated everything about myself and what I became. Then Sannie…I carried on – Scared, Cross, Down, Happy, Frustrated, Crazy…you name it. All the feelings you are going through now. If you did not experience these emotions I would have worried about you. Iron Lady?

To go back to what is known is to die!!

I share yesterdays “Daily Reflections” with you. This passage kept me going and going and going…..

“My first true freedom is the freedom not to have to take a drink today. If I truly want it, I will work the Twelve Steps and the happiness of this freedom will come to me through the Steps – sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. Other freedoms will follow, and inventorying them is a new happiness. I had a new freedom today, the freedom to be me. I have the freedom to be the best me I have ever been”

Aren’t you glad it is only two of the hens that appears to be roosters. How boring it would have been if they where all hens or all roosters. Sometimes life is fair, even though just to the animals.

Your mixed feelings…Normal
Your confusion…Human.
Your chat with your Dad…Priceless!!
Crow on your heap…morning is breaking.

Cheers – K